150 Best Bagel Puns and Jokes That Will Make You Hole-y Laugh

Feeling a little crumby? Need a hole lot of laughter in your day? Get ready to be toasted because we’re diving headfirst into the delicious world of bagel puns and jokes!

Prepare for a schmear-tastic collection of one-liners that will have you rolling with laughter. From the classic “everything bagel” humor to some truly hole-arious originals, we’ve got the perfect dough-ses of fun.

So, grab your favorite bagel (with cream cheese, of course!) and get ready to enjoy these pun-tastic treats. Let’s get this bread!

Best Bagel Puns and Jokes That Will Make You Hole-y Laugh

• What do you call a sad bagel? A blue-berry.
• Why did the bagel go to therapy? It was feeling hole-y inadequate.
• I tried to make a bagel pun, but it came out plain.
• Did you hear about the bagel that became a stand-up comedian? He had everyone rolling.
• My bagel-loving friend is so corny, you could say he’s everything.
• A bagel and a croissant were racing. The bagel won, because it was on a roll.
• I told my bagel I loved it, but it just gave me a glaze-d over look.
• What’s a bagel’s favorite type of music? R&B (Rye and Bialy).
• A bagel walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve food here.” The bagel replies, “But I’m already toasted!”
• Why are bagels such bad secret keepers? Because they always have a hole story to tell.
• My doctor told me to cut back on bagels. I said, “That’s just a hole lot of nonsense!”
• Two bagels are sitting in an oven. One says, “Wow, it’s getting hot in here!” The other one shouts, “Holy schmokes, a talking bagel!”
• I started a bagel delivery service. It’s doing okay, but business is a little hole-y.
• What did the bagel say to the cream cheese? “You’re the schmear delight of my life!”
• Why did the bagel break up with the donut? He said she was too hole-d back.

Bagel Puns: A Hole Lot of Laughs

Dive into a world where bagels aren’t just breakfast; they’re comedy gold! “Bagel Puns: A Hole Lot of Laughs” explores the hilarious side of these doughy delights. Get ready for a schmear of witty wordplay and a topping of side-splitting jokes. Prepare to be amused and maybe even crave a…

• I’m not sure what to say, I’m feeling bagel-d over!
• Bagels are knotty or nice, they’re dough-pendent on your fillings.
• Let’s raise a toast…ed bagel, to good times!
• You’re everything I avo wanted on my bagel.
• Bagel better believe I’m having one for breakfast.
• I’m bready to start my day with a bagel.
• Bagels are my everything, especially on a Sunday morning.
• Donut even get me started on bagels, they’re hole-y delicious.
• I’m bagel-ing you to try this new cream cheese.
• Having a hole-some time eating this bagel.
• You bake me so happy, bagel.
• Bagels are my dough-pe.
• Life is what you bake it, so bake it a bagel.
• What do you call a bagel that tells jokes? A crumb-edian.
• Everything is bagel-icious.

Knead to Know: The Best Bagel Jokes

Looking for a hole-y good time? “Knead to Know: The Best Bagel Jokes” is your schmear-t choice from “Bagel Puns and Jokes.” This collection is stuffed with dough-lightful puns and bagel-themed humor that’s guaranteed to make you and your friends laugh. Get ready for some everything-bagel-related hilarity!

• I’m bready to start my day with a bagel in hand.
• Bagels: the only food that can be hole-y and delicious at the same time.
• You’re the everything to my bagel.
• What does a bagel say to their sweetheart? “You make me whole.”
• I love bagels because they’re so versatile – they can be savory or sweet, just like my personality!
• Let’s bake the world a better place, one bagel at a time.
• Having a hole-some time eating this bagel.
• Bagels are knotty or nice, they’re dough-pendent on your fillings.
• I bagel you to try this new cream cheese flavor.
• Life is what you bake it, so bake it a bagel.
• Everything is bagel-icious.
• That feeling when you finally get the perfect schmear-to-bagel ratio.
• Bagels: proof that it’s okay to be a little dense sometimes.
• You bagel my heart.
• Bagel better believe I’m having one for breakfast.

Everything Bagel Puns: Seasoned for Silliness

Dive into the delightfully doughy depths of “Everything Bagel Puns: Seasoned for Silliness!” This section is your one-stop shop for jokes packed with poppy seeds, sesame seeds, and a whole lotta laughter. Get ready to experience bagel humor at its most *everything* – expect puns so good, they’re worthy of…

• I’ve got a hole lotta love for bagels.
• Just bagel with it!
• Life is what you bake it, so bake it a bagel.
• I’m bagel-ing you to try this new flavor.
• You make me feel hole again.
• Bagels: Proof that circles can be delicious.
• It’s bagel-time!
• I’m not sure what to say, I’m just bagel-d over!
• Bagels: The breakfast of champeons.
• This bagel is hole-y satisfying.
• I’m bready to start my day with a bagel.
• You’re everything I avo wanted on my bagel.
• Bagels: A hole new level of breakfast.
• Bagel better believe I’m having one for breakfast.
• This bagel is hole-some.

Bagel Puns for Foodies: Deliciously Funny

Dive into a world of dough-lightful humor with “Bagel Puns for Foodies: Deliciously Funny”! This collection is more than just jokes; it’s a celebration of bagels and wordplay. From “everything bagel” puns to cream cheese quips, it’s the perfect recipe for a good laugh and a tasty time. Get ready…

• I’m bready to start the day with a bagel in hand.
• You make me feel hole again.
• Bagels: A hole new level of breakfast.
• Bagels: proof that it’s okay to be a little dense sometimes.
• Everything is bagel-icious.
• Bagels are knotty or nice, they’re dough-pendent on your fillings.
• I love you a hole lot.
• Bagels: Proof that circles can be delicious.
• Bagels: A hole new level of breakfast.
• Bagels: the only food that can be hole-y and delicious at the same time.
• I bagel you to try this new cream cheese flavor.
• I’m bagel-d over!
• I’m bagel-ing you to try this new flavor.
• I’m bready to start my day with a bagel in hand.
• You’re everything I avo wanted on my bagel.

Lox, Stocks, and Bagel Jokes: Investing in Humor

Dive into the delicious world of bagel humor! “Lox, Stocks, and Bagel Jokes” explores how puns and wordplay can be an investment, enriching conversations and bringing joy. Discover how a simple bagel can be a source of endless amusement, proving that humor, like a well-toasted bagel, is best when shared.

• I’m reading a book about bagels, it’s a hole new world.
• Bagels are the best, they’re always there for you, even when you’re feeling crumby.
• I tried to make a bagel disappear, it was a hole magic trick.
• My love for bagels is un-rye-valed.
• That’s what I call a sch-meal deal.
• What do you call a bagel that’s also a superhero? Captain Hole-y.
• I’m not sure about this new bagel flavor, it seems a little out there. I guess you could say it’s a bit dough-btful.
• Why did the bagel go to the doctor? It was feeling a little seed-y.
• Two bagels were talking, one says to the other “You’re the only one for me, you fill my hole heart.”
• I accidentally ate a bagel with cement in it. Now I have a concrete gut.
• I’m a bagel-iever, I believe in the power of carbs.
• What’s a bagel’s favorite game? Hole-ympics.
• I’m not sure what to say, I’m just bagel-d by your beauty.
• What do you call a bagel that’s a secret agent? A double-O-doughnut.
• I’m so glad it’s bagel day, I’ve been waiting a hole week.

Bagel Puns: From Plain to Hilarious

Dive into the delightful world of bagel puns! This collection explores the spectrum, from simple wordplay to laugh-out-loud humor. Whether you’re a seasoned punster or just seeking a chuckle, these bagel jokes offer a hole-lotta fun. Get ready to experience the dough-lightful side of breakfast!

• I’m not lazing, I’m just bagel-axing.
• That new everything bagel flavor is a little out there, it’s very dough-riginal.
• Heard the one about the bagel who became a stand-up comedian? He was on a roll.
• I’m trying to live a more hole-some life, starting with this bagel.
• Bagels are just bread that dared to be round.
• Let’s meet for breakfast, I’ll bagel you a call.
• I’m not sure what to say, I’m just bagel-d over by your kindness.
• A bagel’s favorite type of music? Rye and B.
• I’m so bagel-d to see you.
• You make me feel hole again.
• I’m bready to start my day with a bagel in hand.
• Bagels are my dough-pe.
• Bagels are like hugs you can eat.
• I can’t be held responsible for anything I say before I’ve had my bagel.
• This bagel is hole-y satisfying.

Rise to the Occasion: Bagel Puns for Every Mood

Need a laugh? “Rise to the Occasion: Bagel Puns for Every Mood” is your go-to resource within “Bagel Puns and Jokes”! Whether you’re feeling hole-y disappointed or simply want to spread some joy, this section delivers perfectly baked puns for every emotion. Get ready to sprinkle some humor into your…

• I’m bready for a bagel, any time of day.
• Let’s get this bagel rolling and start the day right.
• Having a bagel is a hole-some experience.
• Bagels are my daily doughse of happiness.
• I’m on a bagel diet; I see it, I eat it, and I love it.
• You’re the only bagel for me; you fill my hole heart.
• Bagels: Proof that good things come in round packages.
• I’m not sure what to say, I’m just bagel-d by your kindness.
• Life is too short to say no to a bagel with cream cheese.
• Bagels are my love language; it’s a hole different story when I’m with you.
• I’m not sure about this new bagel flavor, it seems a little out there. I guess you could say it’s a bit dough-btful.
• You can always count on a bagel to be there for you, it’s a very com-crumb-table meal.
• I’m a bagel-iever in the power of a good breakfast to start the day off right.
• I’m not sure what to say, I’m just feeling bagel-d over by your beauty.
• Bagels: Always there for you, from the beginning of the day to the end.

Donut Even Go There: Bagel Puns Reign Supreme

Forget sugary confections! “Donut Even Go There” declares war on donut dominance. This section champions the superior form of wordplay: bagel puns! Prepare for a hole-y hilarious experience, filled with dough-lightful jokes and poppy seed-sational humor. Get ready to laugh until you’re crusted over with amusement – bagel humor reigns…

• I’m not sure what to say, I’m just bagel-d by your sense of humor.
• This new bagel flavor is everything – and everything else too.
• Let’s toast to a future filled with bagels and laughter!
• I’m not sure what to say, I’m just bagel-d by your kindness.
• I’m so glad I found you, life without you would be hole-less.
• I’m starting a bagel-themed book club. We’ll be reading hole-y texts.
• You make my heart complete; you fill the bagel-shaped hole in my life.
• I’m not sure what to say, I’m just feeling bagel-d over by your generosity.
• I’m not sure what to say, I’m just bagel-d over by your beauty.
• I’m not sure what to say, I’m just feeling bagel-d over by your compassion.
• You’re the sesame seed to my bagel; you make everything better.
• I’m not sure what to say, I’m just feeling bagel-d over by your intelligence.
• I’m not sure what to say, I’m just feeling bagel-d over by your spirit.
• I’m starting a bagel-themed self-help group. It’s all about finding your inner hole-ness.
• I’m not sure what to say, I’m just bagel-d over by your wit.