150 Best DND Paladin Puns and Jokes Holy Smokes These Are Funny

Ready to smite some boredom with a holy dose of humor? If your idea of a good time involves rolling dice and upholding justice, then you’ve come to the right place. We’re diving headfirst into the realm of DnD Paladin puns and jokes, where righteous might meets hilarious wit.

Prepare for a crusade of chuckles as we explore the lighter side of these divinely inspired warriors. From oaths broken (in laughter, of course) to sacred puns, this post is packed with enough comedy to make even the most stoic paladin crack a smile. Let’s get started!

Best DND Paladin Puns and Jokes Holy Smokes These Are Funny

• Why did the Paladin break up with the rogue? He said she had too many… *shady* dealings.
• A Paladin walks into a library and asks for books about morality. The librarian replies, “They’re in the self-help section.” The Paladin smiles and says, “Perfect, I’ll read them all myself!”
• What do you call a Paladin who’s also a baker? A holy roller.
• I tried to teach my Paladin friend how to play poker. He kept saying, “I call your bluff with divine smite!”
• My Paladin character is so lawful, he even alphabetizes his potions.
• A Paladin was having a bad day, so he prayed for guidance. He heard a voice, “Have you tried turning your smite off and on again?”
• Why did the Paladin get kicked out of the restaurant? He insisted on a righteous meal, and refused to pay for anything “unholy”.
• What’s a Paladin’s favorite type of music? Holy rock and roll.
• A Paladin and a Bard walk into a bar. The Paladin says, “I’ll have a water, I’m on a sacred quest.” The Bard orders a double ale, then winks and says “And I’m on a quest for a good time.”
• A Paladin was trying to open a pickle jar. He kept saying, “By the power of my deity, I shall… *SMITE* this lid!”
• My Paladin is so dedicated, he uses holy water to make his morning coffee.
• What do you call a Paladin with a broken leg? A “holy roller coaster”
• Two Paladins are arguing about who’s more righteous. It was a very… *heated* debate.
• Why did the Paladin refuse to use the cursed weapon? He felt it was morally… *wrong* to handle it.
• I asked a Paladin if he ever felt tempted by evil. He said, “Only when I see a door that needs a good kicking.”

Holy Humor: The Best DnD Paladin Puns

Ready to roll with laughter? Dive into “Holy Humor,” a collection of the best D&D paladin puns! From divine smites to righteous jokes, this section will have you and your party in stitches. Expect plenty of puns about faith, oaths, and the occasional holy hand grenade. Prepare for some truly…

• My paladin’s cooking is so righteous, he only uses *holy* thyme.
• Why did the paladin get a parking ticket? He was parked in a *no-smite* zone.
• I asked my paladin friend if he ever felt tempted by evil. He said, “Only when I see a poorly organized bookshelf.”
• A paladin walks into a bar and orders a drink, then says, “Make it a *holy* water, I’m on a mission from God.”
• My paladin’s attempts at strategy are always a bit *divine*-ly inspired, but tactically questionable.
• What do you call a paladin who can’t keep a secret? A *leaky* oath-keeper.
• The paladin’s horse was always getting into trouble; it was a *knight*-mare.
• My paladin’s favorite type of music is *hymn*-core.
• The paladin tried to be subtle, but his armor was a little too *clang*-y.
• What’s a paladin’s favorite kind of puzzle? Anything that involves *righteous* solutions.
• My paladin’s horse is so well-behaved, it only eats *blessed* oats.
• Why did the paladin bring a ladder to the dungeon? He heard the loot was on a *higher* moral ground.
• My paladin’s attempts at gardening were always a bit *holy-moly* unsuccessful.
• What do you call a paladin who is also a talented chef? A *savory* saint.
• My paladin’s favorite board game is *righteous* checkers.

Divine Wordplay: Paladin Jokes for Every Alignment

Ready to smite with laughter? “Divine Wordplay” explores the holy humor of paladins, offering jokes for every alignment, from lawful good to chaotic neutral. Forget stuffy oaths; these puns are righteous and relatable, perfect for livening up any D&D session. Get ready for some divine comedy!

• My paladin’s attempt at being subtle is like a holy hand grenade in a library.
• What do you call a paladin who’s also a gardener? A *righteous* rooter.
• Why did the paladin refuse to use a ladder? He believed in achieving higher ground through *divine* means.
• A paladin’s favorite type of party? Anything with a good crusade-ing theme.
• My paladin’s cooking is so pure, it’s practically *edible* righteousness.
• The paladin’s new strategy is to use his shield as a serving tray, it’s a *plate*-eous maneuver.
• My paladin is so devoted, he only drinks *holy* water with his meals, even at the tavern.
• What do you call a paladin who’s also a comedian? A *hymn*-dinger of laughs, but with a strict moral code.
• The paladin’s attempt to write a love letter was a little *knight*-ish.
• My paladin’s attempts at flirting are always a bit *smite*-ful.
• What do you call a Paladin who’s always running late? A *divine*-ly delayed crusader.
• My paladin’s favorite type of music? Anything with a good *hymn*-ing melody and a strong moral message.
• The paladin’s smite was so powerful, it was a real *holy* shocker to the enemies.
• Why did the paladin bring a first aid kit to the tavern? He heard the drinks were going to be *spirit-ed*.
• My paladin’s armor is so polished, it reflects his *pure* intentions and also the sun, blinding enemies.

Oath-some Laughter: Funny Paladin Moments in DnD

Ever seen a paladin trip over their own holy symbol? Or perhaps misinterpret a prophecy with hilarious results? That’s the realm of “Oath-some Laughter,” where the stern, oath-bound warriors of D&D become unintentional comedians. These funny moments, often fueled by puns and jokes, remind us that even the most righteous…

• My paladin’s favorite workout is *smite*-lifting.
• What do you call a paladin who is also a baker? A *crusader* of croissants.
• The paladin’s attempt at a stealth check was less ‘silent knight’ and more ‘holy-clanging-armor-in-a-library’.
• Why did the paladin become a librarian? He heard they had a lot of *righteous* tomes.
• My paladin’s horse only eats *blessed* oats, and occasionally, a *holy* carrot.
• The paladin’s new strategy is to use his shield as a mirror, it’s a very *reflective* approach to combat.
• My paladin is so good at cooking, his meals are practically a *divine* culinary experience.
• What’s a paladin’s favorite type of sandwich? A *holy* grilled cheese, with extra righteousness.
• My paladin’s favorite type of music is anything with a good *hymn*-ing harmony and a strong sense of justice.
• My paladin’s attempt at diplomacy usually ends with him saying, “By the power invested in me, I declare this conversation over!”
• The paladin’s new strategy is to use his holy symbol as a disco ball, it’s a real *light*-ning show of faith.
• What do you call a paladin who’s also a tailor? A *righteous* stitch-er of justice.
• My paladin’s attempts at flirting are always a bit *smite*-tingly awkward, but well-intentioned.
• Why did the paladin refuse to play cards? He said he only deals with *lawful* good hands, and doesn’t like to *shuffle* his morals.
• My paladin’s favorite board game is *moral* monopoly, where you collect good deeds instead of properties.

Smiting with Smiles: Hilarious Paladin Combat Puns

Forget smiting foes with righteous fury; try smiting them with smiles! This corner of D&D humor revels in paladin puns so bad, they’re good. Expect divine wordplay, holy ha-has, and maybe a few groans. It’s all about adding a lighthearted twist to the normally serious knight in shining armor.

• My paladin’s dedication to justice is so strong, he even irons his armor with a righteous press.
• What do you call a paladin who’s also a talented gardener? A crusader of the *holy* soil.
• The paladin’s attempts at stealth were less ‘silent knight’ and more ‘clanging-armor-in-a-china-shop’.
• My paladin’s favorite type of restaurant? Any place with a *divine* menu and a strong moral code.
• When my paladin gets a paper cut, he declares it an act of unholy aggression.
• What’s a paladin’s favorite way to travel? A *holy* roller coaster of righteous speed.
• Why did the paladin refuse to use the cursed artifact? He said it was a matter of *principled* possession.
• My paladin’s smites are so powerful, they’re practically a *divine* intervention of shock and awe.
• The paladin’s attempt at a joke was so bad, it was a real *pun*-ishment to listen to.
• What do you call a paladin who’s also a talented baker? A *righteous* roller of dough.
• My paladin’s favorite board game is *Chivalry* Checkers, where you have to play fair and fight for the right.
• My paladin’s cooking is so good, he only uses *holy* spices, and maybe a pinch of righteousness.
• The paladin’s favorite subject in school? *Moral* math, where he can calculate the right thing to do.
• Why did the paladin get a parking ticket? He parked in a *no-smite* zone, for the greater good.
• A paladin walks into a library, orders a book on ethics, and says, “I’d like to *check* this out, for the greater good.”

Roleplaying with Rib-Ticklers: Paladin Character Jokes

Ever tried roleplaying a paladin with a serious oath, then dropped a joke so bad it made the dragon chuckle? That’s the magic of “Roleplaying with Rib-Ticklers.” It’s about finding the funny side of righteous knights, using puns and character-specific humor to lighten the adventuring mood. Get ready for holy…

• My paladin’s horse refuses to drink anything but *holy* water, he says it’s a matter of principle.
• What do you call a paladin who is also a stand-up comedian? A *smite*-ly funny guy.
• My paladin’s attempt at cooking resulted in a meal so righteous it practically *purged* the hunger from our souls.
• Why did the paladin refuse to use the cursed sword? He said it would be a *grave* error in judgement.
• My paladin always uses his shield as a mirror, he says it’s important to reflect on his actions and look *righteous* doing it.
• A paladin walks into a tailor shop and asks for armor that’s both protective and *holy* fashionable.
• What’s a paladin’s favorite board game? *Oath*-opoly, where you collect good deeds instead of properties.
• My paladin’s attempts to be stealthy are like a beacon of righteousness, impossible to *conceal*.
• My paladin’s favorite type of music is anything with a good *hymn*-ing harmony and a strong sense of justice, played on a lute.
• What do you call a paladin who’s always losing his keys? A *key*-less crusader.
• My paladin’s prayers are so powerful, they’re practically *divine*-ly over-the-top.
• My paladin keeps his armor so pristine, it’s a real *shining* example of dedication to his oath.
• Why did the paladin get a parking ticket? He parked in a *no-smite* zone, he thought he was above the law.
• My paladin’s cooking is so pure, he only uses *holy* basil and a pinch of divine intervention.
• A paladin walks into a library and asks for the most righteous book, the librarian hands them the dictionary, “Start with the *definition* of good.”

Lay on Hands…Or Giggles: Healing-Themed Paladin Puns

Ever felt like your D&D party needs a little divine intervention and a good laugh? Then “Lay on Hands…Or Giggles” is your holy grail! This collection of paladin puns and jokes will have you channeling your inner cleric of comedy. From righteous puns to healing humor, it’s the perfect way…

• My paladin’s healing touch is so effective, it’s practically a *divine* defibrillator.
• Why did the paladin become a surgeon? He had a real *calling* for mending bones and spirits.
• My paladin’s healing spells are so quick, they’re practically *holy* fast-food.
• What do you call a paladin who’s also a massage therapist? A *laying on hands* professional.
• The paladin’s healing was so potent, it had a *saintly* effect on all who received it.
• My paladin uses his Lay on Hands so often, he should probably get a *divine* hand-sanitizer.
• Why did the paladin refuse to use a bandage? He said his healing was a *cut* above the rest.
• My paladin’s healing is so good, it’s not just a mend, it’s a *miracle*-mend.
• What’s a paladin’s favorite kind of tea? *Holy* chamomile, for a truly soothing experience.
• The paladin’s healing aura was so strong, it felt like a *blessed* hug.
• My paladin’s healing spells are like a *divine* warranty, good as new every time.
• Why did the paladin bring a first aid kit to the tavern? He heard the drinks were *spirit*-ually potent and needed some backup.
• My paladin’s healing is so effective, it can even fix the DM’s bad dice rolls…almost.
• What do you call a paladin who’s always giving out healing? A *saint-sational* caregiver.
• The paladin’s method of healing was so gentle, it was a *touch* of grace.

Channeling Comedy: Paladin Spell and Ability Jokes

Ever tried smiting with a side of slapstick? Paladin puns aren’t just about holy righteousness; they’re about divine delivery! Think of channeling spells as a stand-up routine, where your abilities become punchlines. “Divine Smite? More like Divine Smite-ly funny!” Get ready for some sacred silliness.

• My paladin’s radiant damage is so bright, it’s practically a *light*-mare for the undead.
• What do you call a paladin who’s a terrible liar? A *false* knight.
• My paladin’s aura of protection is so strong, it’s practically a *shield*-ing force field.
• The paladin’s new strategy is to use his divine sense to find the best deals, a real *righteous* bargain hunter.
• A paladin walks into a bakery, orders a loaf of bread, and says “I’ll take this for the *greater good*.”
• My paladin’s divine smite is so powerful, it’s a real *holy* terror for the bad guys.
• Why did the paladin get a job as a baker? He wanted to make some *holy* bread and spread the love.
• What do you call a paladin who’s also a gardener? A *crusader* of the green.
• My paladin’s lay on hands is so effective, it’s like a *divine* first aid kit, but with sparkles.
• The paladin’s attempt at a surprise attack was less stealthy and more *holy-smokes-I’m-here*.
• My paladin’s oath of devotion is so strong, he even *swears* by his deity.
• My paladin is so lawful good, he alphabetizes his enemies before fighting them.
• What do you call a paladin who’s also a musician? A *hymn*-dinger of a hero.
• My paladin’s aura of courage is so inspiring, it’s a real *bold*-en experience for the party.
• The paladin’s attempt to be subtle was like a beacon of righteousness trying to *hide* in the shadows.

Lawful Good Guffaws: Clean and Clever Paladin Humor

Looking for some wholesome laughs? “Lawful Good Guffaws” is your treasure chest of clean, clever paladin humor. Think puns about oaths, divine smites, and righteous quests, all delivered with a paladin’s earnest charm. It’s the perfect antidote to dungeon gloom and a guaranteed smile for every DnD enthusiast.

• My paladin’s favorite type of coffee? Holy roast.
• What do you call a paladin who’s always on time? A punctual crusader.
• My paladin’s horse is so righteous, it only eats hay that’s been blessed.
• Why did the paladin refuse to use the enchanted sword? He said it was a matter of *principled* possession, and he had to uphold his oath.
• A paladin walks into a library and asks for books on ethics, he says, “I’m looking for the *holiest* of tomes.”
• What’s a paladin’s favorite type of puzzle? One that involves finding the *righteous* solution.
• My paladin’s attempt at stealth was like a holy beacon trying to hide in a closet.
• What do you call a paladin who’s also a talented gardener? A *saintly* cultivator.
• My paladin’s cooking is so good, he only uses *divine* ingredients.
• Why did the paladin get a job at the bakery? He wanted to make bread that was *holy* and wholesome.
• My paladin’s armor is so shiny, it reflects his *pure* heart and also blinds his enemies.
• My paladin’s prayers are so powerful, they’re practically a *divine* intervention of awesomeness, but with extra politeness.
• What do you call a paladin who’s also a talented chef? A *savory* knight.
• My paladin’s favorite kind of music is anything with a good *hymn*-ing harmony and a strong sense of justice, played loudly.
• My paladin’s attempt at flirting was so awkward, it was a real *smite*-ingly embarrassing moment.