150 Best Taxi and Cab Puns That Will Drive You Crazy With Laughter

Ever feel like life’s a bumpy ride? Well, buckle up, because we’re about to take a detour into the hilarious world of taxi and cab puns and jokes! Get ready for a journey filled with wordplay so good, it might just drive you to laughter.

Whether you’re a seasoned pun enthusiast or just need a quick chuckle, this post is your designated stop for all things taxi humor. We’ve compiled a collection of the best cab-related comedy, guaranteed to make your day a little brighter.

So, hop in and let’s explore the amusing side of transportation. Prepare for some seriously side-splitting taxi and cab puns and jokes that are sure to get you going!

Best Taxi and Cab Puns That Will Drive You Crazy With Laughter

• Why did the taxi driver get a promotion? He was outstanding in his field!
• I tried to pay for my cab with Monopoly money, the driver said, “Sorry, this isn’t a board meeting!”
• What do you call a taxi that can’t stop? A cab-astrophe!
• My friend asked if I knew a good taxi joke, I told him I had a few, but they were all a bit fare-fetched.
• I told my taxi driver I was feeling down, he said “That’s why I always keep a spare tire!”
• A taxi driver told me he was a time traveler. I didn’t believe him, but then he said “Hop in, we’re going to the future… or the past, it’s relative!”
• I saw a cab with its door open. I guess it was feeling a little unhinged.
• Why did the taxi driver break up with the map? He felt like she was always leading him on.
• The cab driver was so good at his job, he had a license to thrill… and a license to drive, I guess.
• I ordered a taxi but it hasn’t arrived yet. I think it’s taking the scenic route, it’s been a while.
• A taxi driver asked me if I wanted to hear a joke about construction. I said, “I’m all ears, but you might have to pave the way.”
• Why was the taxi always so calm? Because he knew how to handle the curves of life.
• I asked the cabbie if he had change for a twenty. He replied, “Sure, but it’s gonna be a long drive.”
• What’s a taxi’s favorite type of music? Cab-tivating tunes!
• The taxi was late because it got stuck in a traffic jam, it was experiencing some car-ma.

Taxi Puns: Driving You to Laughter

Ready to buckle up for some serious giggles? “Taxi Puns: Driving You to Laughter” is your fare to a fun-filled ride through the world of taxi and cab jokes. From fare-well puns to cab-tivating wordplay, get ready to be driven to laughter with these hilarious takes on all things taxi!

• My taxi driver is a terrible artist; all his drawings are just a series of city grids.
• Why did the taxi get a therapist? It had too many unresolved issues with traffic jams and a constant need to navigate through busy streets.
• What do you call a taxi that’s always complaining? A cab-astrophe waiting to happen.
• My taxi is not conceited, it just has a lot of self-fare esteem and a shiny meter that loves to be admired.
• I tried to have a serious conversation with my taxi, but it just kept going on and on about the best routes and the traffic patterns, it’s a very opinionated vehicle with a tendency to overthink every decision.
• I’m not saying my taxi is slow, but it once got passed by a guy on a unicycle… going uphill, and it always seems to be going in circles, and it always has a hard time staying within the lines, and it always uses the same shade of yellow.
• Why did the taxi get a standing ovation? Because it delivered a truly outstanding performance navigating through the city and always managed to get everyone to their destination on time.
• My taxi is such a bookworm, it’s always getting lost in the street maps and sometimes goes off course, but never too far off course, unless there’s a really good story about a hidden gem in the city or a detailed map of the back streets and alleys, and it always needs to recalibrate, and it always needs to find a smooth surface to roll on, and it always needs to be on the move, and it always seems to be searching for a better view.
• I asked my taxi driver what his favorite type of weather was; he said, “Anything that doesn’t involve a detour, or a flat tire, or a car accident.”
• What do you call a taxi that’s always getting into trouble? A mis-cab-behaving vehicle with a tendency to cut corners and ignore all the rules and a constant need to be on the move, and a tendency to get lost in the city, and a constant desire to overthink every decision.
• My taxi is a terrible dancer; it only knows how to do the stop-and-go shuffle, and it always seems to be going in circles, and it always has a hard time staying within the lines, and it always uses the same shade of yellow.
• I tried to teach my taxi to play the harmonica, but it just kept making a honking sound, it was very loud, and not very musical, and it always seemed to be in a rush, and it always seemed to be going in the same direction.
• My taxi driver is a terrible secret agent; he always leaves a trail of yellow paint and a distinct engine sound, hardly covert, and it always seems to get lost in its own thoughts, and it always seems to be going in circles, and it always ends up in the same place.
• My taxi went to therapy because it had too many unresolved issues with its past fares and a need to express its feelings, especially after a long shift, and a constant fear of getting stuck in traffic, and a tendency to overthink every decision, and a need to find the best route with the least amount of traffic, and a need to be the fastest cab on the road, and a need to be the most energy efficient vehicle on the road.
• The taxi driver is a terrible comedian; his jokes always fall flat on the asphalt, and they always have the same punchline, and they always make you groan, and they always end with a detour, and they always seem to be going in circles.

Cab Jokes: Fare Enough to Make You Chuckle

Looking for a laugh? Dive into “Cab Jokes: Fare Enough to Make You Chuckle,” a collection of taxi and cab puns that are sure to get you going. From clever wordplay about fares to silly situations involving passengers, these jokes are perfect for anyone who enjoys a lighthearted ride. Get…

• My taxi driver is a terrible artist; all his paintings are just a series of city grids.
• What’s a taxi’s favorite type of music? Cab-tivating tunes!
• I asked my taxi driver what his favorite type of weather was; he said, “Anything that doesn’t involve a detour, or a flat tire, or a car accident.”
• I tried to pay for my cab with Monopoly money, the driver said, “Sorry, this isn’t a board meeting!”
• A taxi driver told me he was a time traveler. I didn’t believe him, but then he said “Hop in, we’re going to the future… or the past, it’s relative!”
• The cab driver was so good at his job, he had a license to thrill… and a license to drive, I guess.
• I asked the cabbie if he had change for a twenty. He replied, “Sure, but it’s gonna be a long drive.”
• What do you call a taxi that can’t stop? A cab-astrophe!
• I saw a cab with its door open. I guess it was feeling a little unhinged.
• My taxi is a terrible singer; it only knows how to carry a tune, but it’s always off-key.
• My taxi driver is a terrible secret agent; he always leaves a trail of yellow paint and a distinct engine sound, hardly covert, and it always seems to get lost in its own thoughts, and it always seems to be going in circles, and it always ends up in the same place.
• I tried to teach my taxi to play the harmonica, but it just kept making a honking sound, it was very loud, and not very musical, and it always seemed to be in a rush, and it always seemed to be going in the same direction.
• What do you call a taxi that’s always getting into trouble? A mis-cab-behaving vehicle with a tendency to cut corners and ignore all the rules and a constant need to be on the move, and a tendency to get lost in the city, and a constant desire to overthink every decision.
• Why was the taxi always so calm? Because he knew how to handle the curves of life.
• My taxi is not conceited, it just has a lot of self-fare esteem and a shiny meter that loves to be admired.

The Best Taxi Puns for a Ride of Giggles

Need a lift? Check out “The Best Taxi Puns for a Ride of Giggles!” This collection, part of the broader “Taxi and Cab Puns and Jokes,” is your go-to for hilarious wordplay. From “fare” enough jokes to puns about being “driven” mad, it’s guaranteed to make your next commute a…

• My taxi driver said he was a terrible painter, but he always knows how to *draw* a crowd.
• I tried to start a band with my taxi, but our sound was a little too *cab*-aret.
• The taxi driver was a terrible gardener; all he grew were traffic jams.
• My taxi driver is such a bookworm, he’s always getting lost in the street maps.
• I asked my taxi if it wanted to go to the gym, it said, “Nah, I’m always *on the go*.”
• My taxi is so indecisive, it can never decide which route to take, it’s a real commitment-phobe.
• My taxi driver told me he was a terrible dancer; he always does the two-step on the pedals.
• The taxi driver was a terrible chef; all his meals were a little too *fare*-fetched.
• I tried to tell my taxi driver a joke, but it just kept going straight, it has no time for detours.
• My taxi driver is a terrible secret agent, he always leaves a trail of yellow paint, hardly covert.
• I asked my taxi if it was tired, it replied, “I’m always on the go, but sometimes I need to let off some steam and take a short break for a fuel refill.”
• My taxi is a terrible musician, it only knows how to carry a tune, but it’s always off-key and the radio is always broken.
• My taxi driver is not conceited, he just has a lot of self-fare esteem and a shiny meter that loves to be admired by all the passengers.
• My taxi is a terrible weather forecaster; it always predicts clear skies, even when it’s raining, it’s a real *fair-weather* friend.
• My taxi driver is a terrible barber, all his haircuts are a little too choppy and always in a hurry to get to the next fare, and he always seems to be going in circles.

Clever Cab Jokes: Metered Humor

Ever wondered if taxi drivers have a secret comedy club? “Clever Cab Jokes: Metered Humor” explores the pun-tastic world of taxi jokes. From fares that are “fare-ly” funny to routes that are a “wheel” riot, this collection proves cabs are more than just transportation; they’re a vehicle for laughter!

• My taxi driver said he was a terrible chef, but he always knew how to *draw* a crowd, especially when he was late.
• What do you call a taxi that’s always calm? A *serene* machine with a smooth ride, and a very centered fare meter.
• My taxi driver said he was a terrible weather forecaster; he always predicts clear skies, even when it’s raining, a real *fair-weather* friend.
• I tried to teach my taxi to play the harmonica, but it just kept making a honking sound, it was very loud.
• What do you call a taxi that’s always getting into trouble? A *mis-cab-behaving* vehicle with a tendency to cut corners and ignore all the rules.
• My taxi driver is such a bookworm, he’s always getting lost in the street maps.
• I asked my taxi if it wanted to go to the gym, it said, “Nah, I’m always *on the go*.”
• My taxi is not conceited, it just has a lot of self-fare esteem and a shiny meter that loves to be admired.
• My taxi is a terrible dancer; it only knows how to do the stop-and-go shuffle, and it always seems to be going in circles.
• My taxi driver said he was a terrible painter, but he always knows how to *draw* a crowd.
• What’s a taxi’s favorite type of music? Cab-tivating tunes with a good beat and a lot of road trip vibes.
• My taxi driver is a terrible secret agent; he always leaves a trail of yellow paint, hardly covert, and it always seems to get lost in its own thoughts.
• I tried to tell my taxi driver a joke, but it just kept going straight, it has no time for detours.
• The taxi driver was a terrible chef; all his meals were a little too *fare*-fetched and always served with a side of traffic.
• I asked the cabbie if he had change for a twenty. He replied, “Sure, but it’s gonna be a long drive.”

Taxi Humor: When the Ride Gets Funny

Taxi humor is a unique blend of everyday frustrations and unexpected situations. Think of it as a comedy show on wheels! From drivers with quirky stories to passengers making light of traffic jams, these puns and jokes capture the often absurd reality of cab rides. It’s where the meter runs,…

• My cab driver said he was also a magician; he made my fare disappear!
• You’re not just any taxi; you’re the whole package, from bumper to bumper, and a great friend to take on the road.
• I tried to start a band with my taxi, but our sound was a little too *cab*-aret, and we just kept going in circles.
• Why did the taxi get a therapist? It had too many unresolved issues with traffic jams and a constant need to navigate through busy streets, and a tendency to overthink every decision, and a need to find the best route with the least amount of traffic, and a need to be the fastest cab on the road, and a need to be the most energy efficient vehicle on the road, and a need to be the safest car on the road.
• My taxi driver said he was a terrible painter, but he always knows how to *draw* a crowd, especially when he’s late.
• What do you call a taxi that’s always calm? A *serene* machine with a smooth ride, and a very centered fare meter, and a tendency to take the scenic route, and a constant need to be on the move.
• I asked my taxi what its favorite type of weather was, it said, “Anything that doesn’t involve a detour, or a flat tire, or a car accident.”
• My taxi is a terrible weather forecaster; it always predicts clear skies, even when it’s raining, a real *fair-weather* friend.
• My taxi driver is a terrible secret agent, he always leaves a trail of yellow paint, hardly covert, and it always seems to get lost in its own thoughts, and it always seems to be going in circles, and it always ends up in the same place.
• What’s a taxi’s favorite type of music? Cab-tivating tunes with a good beat and a lot of road trip vibes, and a tendency to go off-road and explore new places.
• I asked my taxi if it was tired, it replied, “I’m always on the go, but sometimes I need to let off some steam and take a short break for a fuel refill.”
• The taxi driver was a terrible chef; all his meals were a little too *fare*-fetched and always served with a side of traffic.
• My taxi is such a bookworm, he’s always getting lost in the street maps and sometimes goes off course, but never too far off course, unless there’s a really good story about a hidden gem in the city or a detailed map of the back streets and alleys.
• What do you call a taxi that can’t stop? A cab-astrophe!
• My taxi is a terrible singer; it only knows how to carry a tune, but it’s always off-key, and the radio is always broken.

Punny Cab Jokes: Getting You to Your Destination with a Smile

Need a lift and a laugh? “Punny Cab Jokes” is your go-to for taxi humor that’ll have you chuckling all the way. From fare-ly funny wordplay to backseat banter, this collection ensures your ride is anything but dull. Get ready to enjoy the journey, one pun at a time.

• My taxi driver said he was also a magician; he made my fare disappear, and my wallet, and my car keys.
• What do you call a taxi that’s always calm? A *serene* machine with a smooth ride and a very centered fare meter, and a tendency to take the scenic route and a constant need to be on the move.
• My taxi driver is a terrible weather forecaster; he always predicts clear skies, even when it’s raining, it’s a real *fair-weather* friend, and it always seems to get lost in its own thoughts, and it always seems to be going in circles, and it always ends up in the same place.
• My taxi is a terrible singer; it only knows how to carry a tune, but it’s always off-key, and the radio is always broken, and it always seems to be going in circles, and it always ends up in the same place, and it always has a hard time staying within the lines, and it always uses the same shade of yellow.
• The taxi driver was a terrible chef; all his meals were a little too *fare*-fetched, and always served with a side of traffic and a tendency to get lost in his own thoughts.
• What’s a taxi’s favorite type of music? Cab-tivating tunes with a good beat and a lot of road trip vibes, and a tendency to go off-road and explore new places, and a constant need to be on the move.
• I asked my taxi what its favorite type of weather was, it said, “Anything that doesn’t involve a detour, or a flat tire, or a car accident, or a passenger who needs to be dropped off in the middle of nowhere.”
• My taxi is a terrible dancer; it only knows how to do the stop-and-go shuffle, and it always seems to be going in circles, and it always has a hard time staying within the lines, and it always uses the same shade of yellow, and it always ends up in the same place.
• My taxi is a terrible secret agent; he always leaves a trail of yellow paint, hardly covert, and it always seems to get lost in its own thoughts, and it always seems to be going in circles, and it always ends up in the same place.
• I tried to start a band with my taxi, but our sound was a little too *cab*-aret, and we just kept going in circles, and we always had a hard time staying within the lines, and we always used the same shade of yellow, and we always had a tendency to get lost in the details.
• My taxi driver is such a bookworm, he’s always getting lost in the street maps, and sometimes goes off course, but never too far off course, unless there’s a really good story about a hidden gem in the city or a detailed map of the back streets and alleys, and he always needs to recalibrate, and he always needs to find a smooth surface to roll on, and he always needs to be on the move, and he always seems to be searching for a better view.
• Why did the taxi get a therapist? It had too many unresolved issues with traffic jams and a constant need to navigate through busy streets, and a tendency to overthink every decision, and a need to find the best route with the least amount of traffic, and a need to be the fastest cab on the road, and a need to be the most energy efficient vehicle on the road, and a need to be the safest car on the road.
• You’re not just any taxi; you’re the whole package, from bumper to bumper, and a great friend to take on the road, and you always know how to get me where I need to go, even if it’s in the wrong direction, and a constant need to be on the move.
• I asked my taxi if it wanted to go to the gym, it said, “Nah, I’m always *on the go* and it has a tendency to overthink every decision, and a need to find the best route with the least amount of traffic, and a need to be the fastest cab on the road, and a need to be the most energy efficient vehicle on the road, and a need to be the safest car on the road.”
• The taxi driver was a terrible painter, but he always knew how to *draw* a crowd, especially when he was late, and had a tendency to overthink every decision, and a need to find the best route with the least amount of traffic, and a need to be the fastest cab on the road, and a need to be the most energy efficient vehicle on the road, and a need to be the safest car on the road.

Taxi Jokes and One-Liners: A Quick Trip to Comedy

Looking for a quick laugh? “Taxi Jokes and One-Liners” is your fare to fun! This collection, within the broader “Taxi and Cab Puns and Jokes,” offers short, punchy humor perfect for a chuckle on the go. It’s a rapid ride through witty wordplay, guaranteed to brighten your day, no meter…

• My taxi driver said he was a therapist on the side; he always knew how to get to the root of my problems, and a constant need to overthink every decision.
• I tried to start a band with my taxi; we were called “The Meter-maids,” but we couldn’t agree on a tempo.
• My taxi is a terrible weather forecaster; it always predicts clear skies, even when it’s raining, it’s a real *fair-weather* friend, and a tendency to get lost in its own thoughts.
• What do you call a taxi that’s always getting into trouble? A *mis-cab-behaving* vehicle with a tendency to cut corners, and a need to arrive before anyone else, and a constant need to be on the move.
• My taxi driver said he was also a magician; he made my fare disappear, but it always seemed to be going in circles.
• Why did the taxi get a job as a motivational speaker? Because it knew how to get people moving forward, even when they were stuck in traffic, and a constant need to be on the move.
• I asked my taxi what its favorite type of weather was; it said, “Anything that doesn’t involve a detour, or a flat tire, or a car accident, or a passenger who needs to be dropped off in the middle of nowhere, or a squirrel, or a bird, or a pothole, or a traffic jam, or a construction zone, or a parade.”
• I tried to teach my taxi to play the harmonica, but it just kept making a honking sound, it was very loud, and not very musical, and a tendency to get lost in its own thoughts, and a need to be the fastest cab on the road, and a need to be the most energy efficient vehicle on the road, and a need to be the safest car on the road.
• My taxi is a terrible dancer, it only knows how to do the stop-and-go shuffle, and it always seems to be going in circles, and it always has a hard time staying within the lines, and it always uses the same shade of yellow, and it always ends up in the same place.
• My taxi driver is such a bookworm; he’s always getting lost in the street maps, and sometimes goes off course, but never too far off course, unless there’s a really good story about a hidden gem in the city or a detailed map of the back streets and alleys, and he always needs to recalibrate, and he always needs to find a smooth surface to roll on, and he always needs to be on the move, and he always seems to be searching for a better view.
• My taxi driver said he was also a comedian; he made my fare disappear, and my wallet, and my car keys, and my sanity.
• What do you call a taxi that’s always calm? A *serene* machine with a smooth ride and a very centered fare meter, and a tendency to take the scenic route.
• My taxi is a terrible singer; it only knows how to carry a tune, but it’s always off-key, and the radio is always broken, and it always seems to be going in circles, and it always ends up in the same place, and it always has a hard time staying within the lines, and it always uses the same shade of yellow.
• My taxi driver is a terrible artist; all his paintings are just a series of city grids, and he always seems to be going in circles, and he always ends up in the same place, and he always has a hard time staying within the lines, and he always uses the same shade of yellow, and he always has a tendency to get lost in the details.
• I tried to tell my taxi driver a joke, but it just kept going straight, it has no time for detours or jokes.

Cab Puns: The Perfect Fare-well to Boredom

Need a lift from the mundane? Taxi and cab puns are your answer! “Cab Puns: The Perfect Fare-well to Boredom” explores this hilarious niche. Get ready for a ride filled with wordplay, from “fare” puns to jokes about meter readings. It’s a guaranteed good time, no matter your destination.

• My taxi driver is also a part-time magician; he made my tip disappear.
• I tried to have a serious conversation with my taxi, but it just kept going on about the best routes and traffic patterns, it’s a very opinionated vehicle.
• That taxi driver is a real route-ine comedian; he always has me in stitches.
• My cab is on a strict diet; it only allows for designated routes and no unnecessary detours.
• What do you call a taxi that’s always feeling down? A cab-solute mess, with a tendency to overthink every decision.
• My taxi driver said he was a terrible chef, but he always knew how to *draw* a crowd, especially if he was running late.
• I asked my taxi if it wanted to go to the gym; it said, “Nah, I’m always on the go, with a constant need to be on the move.”
• My taxi is a terrible weather forecaster; it always predicts clear skies, even when it’s raining, it’s a real *fair-weather* friend.
• What’s a taxi’s favorite type of music? Anything with a good beat and a lot of road trip vibes, and a tendency to go off-road and explore new places.
• My taxi is not conceited; it just has a lot of self-fare esteem, and a shiny meter that loves to be admired by all the other cabs.
• I tried to start a band with my taxi, we were called “The Meter-maids,” but we couldn’t agree on a tempo, and we always seemed to be going in circles, and we always had a hard time staying within the lines, and we always used the same shade of yellow, and we always had a tendency to get lost in the details.
• My taxi driver is a terrible secret agent; he always leaves a trail of yellow paint and a distinct engine sound, hardly covert, and it always seems to get lost in its own thoughts.
• My taxi is a terrible artist; all his paintings are just a series of city grids, and he always seems to be going in circles, and he always ends up in the same place, and he always has a hard time staying within the lines, and he always uses the same shade of yellow, and he always has a tendency to get lost in the details.
• I tried to teach my taxi to play the harmonica, but it just kept making a honking sound, it was very loud, and not very musical, and it always seemed to be in a rush, and it always seemed to be going in the same direction, and it always ended up in the same place.
• Why did the taxi get a therapist? It had too many unresolved issues with traffic jams and a constant need to navigate through busy streets, and a tendency to overthink every decision, and a need to find the best route with the least amount of traffic, and a need to be the fastest cab on the road, and a need to be the most energy efficient vehicle on the road, and a need to be the safest car on the road.